An apology, and an explaination
A few days ago we posted this post in some of the DID/OSDD community tags. Some people were (rightfully) annoyed by this, and we took the post out of those tags as soon as we realized that. We’re using those tags now so the people who wanted an apology will see it, as we lost the reblogs when we deleted the original post. This is the last time you will see this blog posting in those tags unless the post is directly related to those subjects.
Firstly, we apologize, firmly for using community specific tags that are not for us. We were not trying to invade, or step on anyone’s space (though we realize in hindsight that that is what we were doing unintentionally.) Next, we wanted to explain why we posted in those tags in the first place, when it’s very clearly not our space to post in, and we recognize that.
We posted information about soulbonding in the DID tags specifically because we have seen lately that the DID community feels invaded and appropriated by non-DID multiples and other people including using their specific language, tags, and community. The DID community is beset by what they consider “fakers” who aren’t dissociative and who have an abundance of fictive “system members”. And they are perfectly right that a lot of these people don’t belong in their community.
What we don’t think they realize is that a lot of these so called ‘fakers’ are not out for attention, or to deliberately appropriate the DID experience.
What is happening is that these people who have “systems” of “fictional introjects” who are clearly not DID sufferers are not faking and trying to be cool and edgy. They are experiencing something. They do have these characters sharing their minds, just not the way that DID sufferers do.
The problem arises that these “fakers” don’t know that their experience has any kind of words to use, or community to draw from. The only words most people in our society know for sharing your mind with someone (even a fictional character) is Dissociative Identity Disorder, or on older terms Multiple Personality Disorder.
These kids (and by and large yes they are kids and teens) experience characters speaking to them in their minds and because they don’t have any other words to reach for, they reach for DID, even when they don’t fit in the DID community.
And then, when they don’t fit in the DID community, they are trying to *force* themselves to fit and force a place for themselves, because as far as they know, it’s a binary. Either they have DID and their experiences are real and valid, or they are “fakers” who are “making the whole thing up for attention.”
These kids don’t want to be in spaces that are not meant for them. Nobody wants to appropriate or invalidate anybody, but they don’t know any better. Nobody can use words that they don’t know, and have never heard of.
Please, stop telling people who have lots of fictional characters sharing their minds that they have to be DID or fake. Just because they are not experiencing what you experience, doesn’t mean their experiences are valid.
Since it is not our place as soulbonders to put soulbonding information in the DID/OSDD community, the burden then falls on the OSDD community to do so. Spread the language that will keep people who don’t belong in your community away from it.
Please, I implore you, when you see people who obviously to you do not fit in your community, please, send them to ours, so we can get out of your hair.
Vocabulary is such a problem in communities like this and there is a reason I stress using the right word for the right thing. Last year we had a lot of people using fictive when they meant fictionkin, and fictionkin when they meant fictive. Its gotten a little better now, thankfully.
Remember that when you use the wrong word, people can be harmed or feel stepped on. That includes calling yourself kin when you’re a copinglinker or synpath, or calling yourself a fictive when your’re fictionkin, etc.
