If you don’t mind me asking, what are the kintypes you’ve been questioning? o3o
I figured someone would ask me this ^^;; Its pretty long, so I’ll put this behind a read more. Feel free to reblog it if you want tho, ask questions, etc.
Naoto Shirogane from Persona 4: the first one I considered. This one had actually been nagging at my mind since last summer. I consider it rejected at this point however, because I think what drew me to it is just the similarities between Naoto and Ken, and also my own life in this universe. Basically, he’s a prodigy genius detective in modern Japan with a group of wacky friends who travel to another dimension to fight evil. Yeah, it reminds me of being Ken. (rejected)
Alphys from Undertale: see below
(rejected)
Undyne from Undertale: Playing Undertale was an amazing and devastating emotional experience for me. I literally cried throughout the last 2 hours of my playthrough. No other game or story has embodied the way I personally feel about games and how they should be played like UT did, and the depth of my experience with it immediately got me wondering if I had kinfeels. Both Undyne and Alphys embody a lot of traits that I have, so I questioned both of them for a little bit along with my girlfriend (who is Meenah from Homestuck). But in the end while both of them are #relatable neither of us ended up feeling like we were kin with them, so much as we had a lot in common, especially as a couple.
(rejected)
Lucifer from Devil is a Part Timer: Devil is a Part Timer could probably give kinfeels even to someone who isn’t kin, because its practically what its about. I watched it 2 summers ago, and questioned it for a while. Lucifer has a lot in common with my other kintypes, Ken and Vriska, a too-smart asshole with dark powers, and he also hits a button neither of those kintypes do, which is my connection with servitude and duty to a master. However, despite feeling like we have a lot of similarities, and even matching my mental image of myself, the connection just isn’t there. I don’t have any memories or even particularly strong feelings about ‘being’ Luci. We’ve got a lot in common, but I’m not him.
(rejected)
Demonic in general: This is the first kintype I ever questioned, back even before realizing I was Ken. I’ve questioned it on and off over and over throughout the years in various flavors, most notably believing for a while I was/might be a mazoku from Slayers. (see below). I finally sat down this last year and really scrutinized why I was so set on feeling like I was demonic, and the answer turned out to rooted in abuse and self esteem problems. Basically I was told I was evil and horrible enough times that I internalized it and found a way to make it feel like a positive and uplifting thing. I don’t have any memories of being a demon, or feelings of specifically demonic power, or any demonkin feelings that aren’t better explained by another kintype. However, I do still feel connected to demons thanks to my upbringing and emotional state so now I am considering it a synpath. (synpath)
Unseelie Fae: I started questioning this when I finally rejected demonic as a kintype, specifically in response to unexplained feelings of power and feelings like I should have the ability to shapeshift, as well as having been drawn since I was a child to faries and such. I actually believed I could see fairies when I was very little. I had never questioned whether I might be fae before because frankly I often felt very ‘unworthy’ of the idea. I did a lot of research into fae kin and the unseelie court, and into specific fae that I might be. (top contender is Mab from the Dresden Files). I feel like this is right, or at least that I am on the right track, but I don’t have enough solid emotional evidence beyond *feelings* to consider it confirmed for myself. Others may feel differently, but I won’t consider it confirmed until I have what I feel is a solid memory. So until then I am still (questioning).
Non-canon character from the Slayers universe: As I mentioned a bit sideways when I talked about maybe being demonic, I’ve been questioning if I was someone from the Slayers world since I found out what being Kin was. In fact, when I first discovered otherkin I came out as Xelloss the mazoku first, before realizing I was completely wrong and I was actually Ken. However, I still claimed privately to be a non-canon mazoku for a number of years, until I finally rejected the label. Rejecting it fully felt so *wrong* however, that I had to come back and question it again, especially after it turned out my fiancee was from that universe. With her help, I’ve explored my draw to and connection with that universe and I’ve come to the conclusion that yes, I did live there as a non-canon human sorceress named Tessadale, at some point. Its not something I have a lot of memories about, but I do have some, and the connection is strong and insistent enough that I am considering it (confirmed)
Pearl from Steven Universe: *insert incoherent screaming of kin panic here*. When I was immediately slapped over the head with Kinfeels towards Pearl when watching Steven Universe last year, I tried desperately to tell myself that she was a soulbond, and to distance her from myself. Of course she’s pop into my head, we’re so alike, I told myself. Repeatedly. But…. no. Soulbond crossover memories and emotions didn’t begin to cover the reaction I was having. I was *incapacitated* every time there was a Pearl-centric episode, and though I tried to deny it that only ever happened to me twice before, with Ken and Vriska. I mean it when I say some of those episodes left me feeling hollowed out and semi-nonfunctional for days.
Fiction is not suppose to do that to you. I had dreams, and visions too. I can SEE the gem Homeworld in my mind’s eye. One of the first things I ever told my mom when I was 3 was that I wanted to do ballet. Ever since I was a child I’ve felt like I was just supposed to be able to use a rapier and to play the violin; abilities I considered so close to my heart that if I wrote a character who could do them I automatically considered them a marysue/garystu. I’ve always felt like there was someone I was supposed to serve and dedicate myself to- something I once attributed to believing I was a mazoku. But this… just made much, much more sense. I don’t want to get into it too much, but basically my pretense that Pearl was a soulbond eventually came crashing down. I haven’t wanted to talk about it a lot, but this is the one a few people close to me know about. I even created a Pearl specific tumblr to avoid talking about it on mine. So yeah, this one’s (confirmed)
